Sunday has become my favorite day of the week.
Except today was a big failure. Recently ive been going to two churches inconsistently. There are some weeks when i am able to attend both, but its been hard waking up after ending work around 3am. Today, i was supposed to attend Bethel to ask pdan about missions, vbs, and discipleship, OHPC, then Onnuri.
10 more minutes became 30. Then 30 minutes because 4 hours. wat was once 8:15 became 12:18. I missed my first two things on my to do list. :( However, i got the courage to be productive and drove my butt to Onnuri. Its strange how i get along w/people older than me, yet i find the people my age... how do i put this.. Naive.
Anyways listening to the pastors sermon, my mind kept slipping in and out of his word, God's word. My mind has been consumed by my everyday troubles, its been hard to see the exit sign. Well what i did get out of it was...
No matter how many times we deny it, we are selfish people. It's always been and has been about ME, I, My.
I want to be content in my life. And some part of me has reached that satisfaction of it is what it is. Things are the way they are. I dont ask for more anymore. Seems that people are always trying to get somewhere higher. Seeking for more. Searching for more. Yearning for more. And yet.. i look outside our boundaries and see others who cant afford more. They cant even afford some. But here we are, praying to God to bless us to get the next promotion, college acceptance, scholarship, car, dress, whatever it is we want. And then we blame and get mad at God for not receiving these things. We say "i worked hard, I prayed everynight, I gave tithe and you know wat? its not worth it"
You see, we're stuck in traffic, They're immobile. Stuck implies a possiblilty of getting out. Immobile implies.. (well you figure it out) .
So i see things as the way they are. The higher you go, the harder you fall.
What goes around comes around.
What goes up must come down.
Cmon you physics people. Its the simple rule of gravity.
anyways. the second thing i gained from today is.
Stop analyzing things. Stop trying to get so close to situations. Things never make sense up close. You always need to take a step back to understand.. to see, the bigger picture.
Except today was a big failure. Recently ive been going to two churches inconsistently. There are some weeks when i am able to attend both, but its been hard waking up after ending work around 3am. Today, i was supposed to attend Bethel to ask pdan about missions, vbs, and discipleship, OHPC, then Onnuri.
10 more minutes became 30. Then 30 minutes because 4 hours. wat was once 8:15 became 12:18. I missed my first two things on my to do list. :( However, i got the courage to be productive and drove my butt to Onnuri. Its strange how i get along w/people older than me, yet i find the people my age... how do i put this.. Naive.
Anyways listening to the pastors sermon, my mind kept slipping in and out of his word, God's word. My mind has been consumed by my everyday troubles, its been hard to see the exit sign. Well what i did get out of it was...
No matter how many times we deny it, we are selfish people. It's always been and has been about ME, I, My.
I want to be content in my life. And some part of me has reached that satisfaction of it is what it is. Things are the way they are. I dont ask for more anymore. Seems that people are always trying to get somewhere higher. Seeking for more. Searching for more. Yearning for more. And yet.. i look outside our boundaries and see others who cant afford more. They cant even afford some. But here we are, praying to God to bless us to get the next promotion, college acceptance, scholarship, car, dress, whatever it is we want. And then we blame and get mad at God for not receiving these things. We say "i worked hard, I prayed everynight, I gave tithe and you know wat? its not worth it"
You see, we're stuck in traffic, They're immobile. Stuck implies a possiblilty of getting out. Immobile implies.. (well you figure it out) .
So i see things as the way they are. The higher you go, the harder you fall.
What goes around comes around.
What goes up must come down.
Cmon you physics people. Its the simple rule of gravity.
anyways. the second thing i gained from today is.
Stop analyzing things. Stop trying to get so close to situations. Things never make sense up close. You always need to take a step back to understand.. to see, the bigger picture.
***
Anyways lovelies.
Id like to dignify myself today.
The word community college, the word transfer. You must think im stupid. I think, you must be crazy.
GPA 3.7
AP Scores : us history: 4, Biology: 5, Lang comp: 3
SAT: 2020
US History: 690
Bio: 750
Math: 800
Key club President, Lieutenant Governor
Council Jr, Sr
Bethel Homeless ministry 3 years
Track 4 years
x Country 2 years
Acceptances: 0
Rejections: MIT, BOSTON COLLEGE, NYU, UCLA, BERKELEY, CORNELL
Wait-list: University of washington in St. Louis accepted, Wellesley withdrew waitlist
Future: Santa Monica College.
Tell me that I'm stupid when im beginning to save up for my life, while you are paying off your debts.
P.S. to someone i do not directly know.
I was deeply offended when you said youd pick UCR over community college anyday.
If it helps, Just like thousands of other people who have not applied to UCR or merced, I was accepted.
You see, we didnt apply for a reason.
Time to turn a deaf ear to those who have nothing encouraging to say.
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