Its 3 in the morning, i got home about 30 min ago.
I should be tired from work, but i chose to drink redbull. Now im wide awake.

Just facebooking. Then i started to see how many of my friends talk to my other set of friends now. (IDK if that made sense) And it got me thinking how mia and out of the loop i am. I dont care. I really dont. People see me, and they think i have plenty of friends. I have friends.. but my definition of a friend is different from that of others. The people i surround myself with are more like acquaintances. Theyre jsut there. Idk. I dont have a set of friends i hang out w/all the time, like others. I dont even have that one best friend anymore.
I do this alot now a days.
After losing many of my close friends due to time, puberty, life. watever it is that separated me from them. . . I jsut chose to shut myself off from the world. I start to become really close to a person, then out of fear and need of change, i shut myself off from them and move on to other people.

I like meeting new people because they dont know me. Its like i get to start all over and have a new image for myself.

I dont know how to deal. Im miserable inside in some ways i cant explain.

Its so clear to me. I dont like any of you.